Lady Spirit & Grief Friend

 A letter to old, familiar, beautiful and sometimes cranky friends.

Dear Lady Spirit,

Thank you (and also, ouchie) for another reminder:

It is actually far more meaningful, impactful and practical to tend to a *few* things/people/plans with as full attention as I can muster—and aligned with my gifts, skills and time/energy—than it is to give halfhearted or distracted presence to *many* things/people/plans. Especially when these things are what I think I *should* be doing, or *should* be good at, or more valued by a consumer society than some other interests or skills I might offer the world. 

It’s hard to notice in myself, but I’m recognizing more and more how easy it is to feel worthy or (dare I say) even superior when my plate is actually fuller than I can handle. You’re telling me all the time, in my very body, that too many of us confuse busyness with rightness. And rightness is not the same thing as righteousness- but that’s for another letter. 

Dear Grief Friend (still coming up with a proper title for you), 

You are often an unwelcome visitor (and your wardrobe of ugly crying and impatience is sure not stylish), but thank you for reminding me that being human and processing life and death and trauma and all of that messy stuff is not a scheduled affair. 

Thank you for reminding me of my limitations, which allows me to be fully present to the deeper, longer work of healing, and offering care & compassion to myself and others. 

Forgive me, Lady Spirit, when I expect too much of myself and others when Grief Friend comes into town and needs room. There is enough, and we can do this. And we are doing this. I’m glad you two pester me with these bits of wisdom, even when ignoring them is much more fun. 

With love and exhales,

Eva